I brought my laptop to the Starbucks two minutes from my house; I had a free drink postcard that I got in the mail for my birthday, so that was added motivation. I need to work on my grad school application, which I have a lot of anxiety about. I go from working on it nonstop to not working on it for three weeks. I came here because there’s too much distraction at home – too much to be done, too much to play around with, too many other priorities waiting there. I’m not super pleasantly pleased with being here because it’s just not quiet enough for me. Since when did I become someone that needed lots of quiet to work and concentrate? Maybe always?
It is interesting to people watch, something I don’t normally have time for. Hell, I don’t have time for it now (hello, I’m here to work!) but sometimes it can’t be helped. I have on super comfy clothes. When my clothes are comfy, I’m comfy, and the more comfy I am the more relaxed I am and the more I can get done. I have on a cotton v-neck t, one I got from the gap at K’s suggestion, so there’s some skin showing. My tattoo half showing. I’m used to people staring at it, but, you know, for like 20 seconds. This guy – THIS GUY – would NOT stop staring. I kept looking up at him, catching him, keeping his stare. Finally, I switched seats at my table so he was looking at my back end instead. Fuck you asshole.
Anyway, I’m on a difficult part of my app, one where I have to write about an event, person, or experience that has been important in my development. Ugh. Back to the grind.
Although, seriously, I’m probably not going to get in. And then I’ll have to quit my job, sell my belongings, and drive around the country for a few months, being completely irresponsible and crazy.
Sounds good.

8 comments
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June 17, 2010 at 10:29 pm
Mel
I live to people watch. I would be happy sitting for hours just observing and listening to those around me. When people act like idiots, I openly stare. Really, if you’re going to act that way in public then why should I pretend to ignore?
Keep plugging away on your application. I’m sure you’re going to do great once you get going.
June 18, 2010 at 3:10 pm
dykeevolution
Staring people are obnoxious. And I’m trying to keep plugging away. Really, I am. Feels like quicksand.
June 17, 2010 at 10:48 pm
kat
Have you ever mentioned what you’re thinking of going to grad school for? In terms of unsolicited advice (sorry, I just can’t help it) Seems like the dissolution of your marriage or caring for your grandmother are pretty significant events.
Good luck with whatever you choose- oh and I would also recommend noise cancellation headphones for your trips to starbucks.
June 18, 2010 at 3:13 pm
dykeevolution
Hey Kat. I’ve mentioned briefly, very briefly, that I’m going for something to do with gender and sexuality studies. I’m still kind of vague myself about what specifically about it I’d like to study. And thanks for the advice … I do think I’m going along with my ex (both having her and not having her).
It’s funny, I had headphones in for Starbucks, but I can’t really concentrate with music in my ears either?!
June 18, 2010 at 8:54 am
Kym
I am also a people watcher, which distracts me from whatever I am working on, so being in public can be bad for me, well, when working on a project.
Good luck with your app, I can’t imagine how hard that is, have you maybe tried the local library for more of a quiet atmosphere?
I get men looking at me from time to time…it grosses me out, lol, keep staring them down and give ‘em an ‘ew, not interested’ kind of look!
Have a nice weekend, it is going to be hot here in NJ!!
June 18, 2010 at 9:16 am
bellygirls
I love people watching. Whenever Holly and I are at gay events, we like to people watch and play ‘match the lesbians’. Gay people are the best to watch.
As for your app part, you write very well and have gone through so much in your life with the break up, losing Gracie, and your grandmother. You could probably grab from this blog about those topics and paste them into your app.
Good luck to you and enjoy your people watching.
June 18, 2010 at 3:14 pm
dykeevolution
I just don’t people watch too often … it’s kind of disturbing. People are strange lol. And thanks for the words of encouragement
June 18, 2010 at 10:16 pm
alphafemme
I totally agree that if you don’t get in you should toss everything to the wind and drive around the country. Part of me wants to do the same thing.